Be Easy-Going and Joyful with Your Family

Thābit b. ʿUbayd said, “Zayd b. Thābit used to be the most cheerful person amongst his family.”

Thābit b. ʿUbayd said, “I never saw anyone more dignified when he sat with people, nor more cheerful in his house than Zayd b. Thābit.”

Encourage Your Child to Fast if He’s Capable

Hishām b. ʿUrwah b. al-Zubayr reported from his father that he would command his children to fast if they were capable of it.

Force Your Child to Learn the Obligatory Aspects of the Dīn

Sufyān al-Thawrī said, “It is necessary for a man to force his child to acquire knowledge, for indeed he will be questioned about it.”

Teach Your Child the Qurʾān

ʿAbd Allāh b. ʿĪsá said, “This Ummah will continue to be upon goodness as long as its children learn the Qurʾān.”

Teach Your Child Manners

ʿUthmān al-Ḥāṭibī said, “I heard Ibn ʿUmar say to a man, ‘Teach your son manners, for indeed you will be asked about your son and what manners you taught him, and what (knowledge) you taught him.’”

Muḥammad b. Sīrīn (d. 110) said, “They used to say, “Honour your child, and teach him excellent manners.”

Sufyān said, “It used to be said that from the rights of a child upon his parent is that he teaches him excellent manners.”

It used to be said, “Manners are from fathers, and righteousness is from Allāh.” And it used to be said, “Whoever teaches his son manners when he is young, he will be delighted with him when grows up.”

Exhort Your Family

Zayd b. Aslam reported from his father that ʿUmar b. al-Khaṭṭāb used to pray whatever Allāh willed during the night. When the end of the night came, he would wake up his family and say, “The prayer, the prayer” and recite {And command your family with prayer} [Ṭā-Hā (20): 132].

al-Ḥasan al-Baṣrī (d. 110) said, “May Allāh have mercy upon one who exhorts himself and his family, and says, ‘O my family, (take care of) your prayer (take care of) your prayer, (take care of) your zakāh (take care of) your zakāh, (take care of) your neighbours (take care of) your neighbours, (take care of) your poor (take care of) your poor; perhaps Allāh will have mercy upon you on the Day of Resurrection, for indeed Allāh praised the servant who does these deeds. He the Majestic and Most High said, {And he used to command his family with prayer and zakāh, and his Lord was pleased with him} [Maryam (19: 55)].”

Muʿāwiyah b. Murrah said that his father used to say to his children after they had prayed ʿIshāʾ, “O my dear children, go to sleep, for perhaps Allāh will provide you with goodness from the night.”

Ṣāliḥ, the son of Imām Aḥmad said that if an ascetic man came to his father, his father would send him to observe that man in the hope that he would be like him.

Be Beneficial to Your Family

Ḍirār b. Murrah used to milk his sheep for his family and draw water for them. He said, “It used to be said, ‘The best of you is the one who is most beneficial to his family.’”

Mubārak b. Saʿīd said, “Sufyān wrote to me, ‘To proceed: look after your family in the best way, and let death be on your mind – peace (be upon you).’”

Providing for Your Family is Better than Optional Acts of Worship

Muslim said that he met Muʿāwiyah b. Qurrah and asked him where he had just come from. He replied he went out and bought food for his family. Muslim asked him whether he acquired it with ḥalāl wealth. He replied, “Yes.” He then said, “It is more beloved to me that I set out every day for what you set out, than praying the night and fasting the day.”

Source: Min Akhbār al-Salaf by Abū Zakariyā al-Bākistānī, pp. 401-406.